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When I was six years old someone tried to kidnap me. She showed up at my school with a handwritten note saying that my mom’s boyfriend (who was with her prior to her death and is a very well know celebrity) had sent her there to pick me up and she was suppose to take me to him.
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When my wife and I first started dating I had a really rough night. She was at a girlfriends house texting me throughout the evening when all of the sudden her text messages stopped. At first I thought it was no big deal but after an hour or so of no contact I had a head full of worries.
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When I was 5 years old I went camping. I don’t really remember the actual camping part but I do remember the car ride back to the house and that’s because I had to pee.
Read MoreMy father was hurt by his parents' poor parenting and then he turned around and continued the cycle by hurting me. As a new dad, I have the opportunity to either unintentionally continue a family lineage of pain, or to stop the cycle.
Love,
Zachary, The Conscious Father
The other day was my birthday and it was amazing. My wife spoiled me (even though I didn’t need to be spoiled) and I got to spend it with my daughter which made it truly special for me. But it’s the day after my birthday that I want to talk to you about.
Read MoreWhat’s a trait that you don’t like about yourself? When we are open and vulnerable about it we can evolve into who we are meant to be.
Love,
Zachary
The vision statement for my spiritual center is Love Only, Forgive Everything, Remember Who You Are. To me this implies that if I bring love into all areas of my life and forgive all resentments, I won't lose site of who I am.
But what happens if you do the exact opposite of Love Only, Forgive Everything, Remember Who You Are? If you judge everyone and forgive nothing you forget who you are. I know because I’ve done this.
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How many times have you not tried something because you were afraid of failing? I’ve lost count.
In my mind if it’s not perfect I will fail. So why even try?
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You’re ugly. You’re stupid. You’re a loser.
Imagine thinking this way about yourself every day. No exaggeration. That was me.
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This past August I took a month off of work to bond with my newborn daughter and it ended up being one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Here’s why.
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I was hooked the first time heard about Instagram. As in checking it compulsively all day every day. That kind of hooked.
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A mentor of mine recently asked me where in my life have I been the most frustrated. Oh that’s an easy one I told him. When I’m surrounded by people that I can’t control.
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I spent years running from my emotions. I attempted to avoid them with television, video games, and social media (plus many other things) never realizing just how much damage I was actually doing to myself. I was cutting myself off from my feelings to the point where I couldn’t recognize them anymore.
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It’s hard to find your inner joy when someone else’s foot is 5 inches from your face. Let me explain.
Yoga has been a part of my life for the past seven years. The more I practice the more I learn about myself. It allows me a glimpse of the joyful and free person I can be in all areas of my life. Last nights class was a perfect example.
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Most people give up on their resolutions by mid March or early April (research shows this). But why? Personally, I think it’s because we aren’t resolving anything within ourselves.
Take me for example. For years I’ve made New Year’s resolutions that I’ve given up on. I start the year excited and ready to go but quickly crash and burn. Where do I start? How do I get from point A to point B? I’m confused! Help!
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It’s 7am when my alarm wakes me up. I roll over and pick up my phone to check Instagram to see how many “likes” my post from yesterday gave me. Not many. Bummer. My internal dialogue goes a little something like this. Why don’t my posts get as many “likes” as other people? I continue to scroll through Instagram and notice that a friend of mine “liked” a picture from someone this morning yet they hadn’t “liked” my picture that was posted yesterday. This brings about more internal dialogue. How come they “liked” that persons photo but not mine? Did I do something wrong to this person? Are they mad at me?
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Perfectionism is a shield that we often use to protect ourselves from getting hurt (or so we think). I learned at a very young age that if I'm as close to perfect as possible I can avoid or minimize judgement and criticism. I didn't believe that it was safe to be seen for who I really was...a scared little boy. This is me putting down my shield and allowing myself to be seen. Imagine a world filled with people putting down their own personal shields and allowing themselves to be seen. That's a world I want to live in. So what's your shield?
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I’ve been looking for a new job, so I recently decided to update my resume.
“Hun, can you please help me with that?”
“Of course, my love.”
“Thanks, babe.”
Not only did my wife help me revamp my resume, she drafted me a killer cover letter as well.
“You’re the best, babe!”
“Happy to help, sweetie.”
I opened the cover letter the other day and found a discrepancy, something that immediately touched my deepest core wound.
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When I was eight years old my father burst into my room in the middle of the night, high on drugs, and threw my dresser drawers all over the place.
“Stop your crying!” he screamed. “Stop your crying!”
There was a crazy man in my room and I was terrified.
“Now clean up this mess!”
I was shaking. What on earth could I have possibly done to deserve this? With a slam of the door he was gone.
Read MoreCopyright Zachary Goodson 2018